Years ago, one of my brothers came to visit me with his girlfriend. When I started to talk to him about their relationship, he looked at me and said,
“You are my brother. You are not my pastor!”
That quickly ended our conversation, but his words still haunt me. I have seven younger brothers and sisters, three adult children, four grandchildren, cousins, and eighteen nieces and nephews. I love them all. From time to time, some of them get into trouble or experience problems in their relationships. Since my day job is helping people discover the wisdom and grace of God so they can live a blessed life, I want to help the people I love. Yet, sometimes the people I love do not want me to give them counsel or advice. That can be frustrating.
When I first started following Jesus, I tried to tell my parents everything I was learning about the Lord. I wanted them to get to know Jesus personally and understand the truths of the Bible. We had conversations where I spoke zealously, and they listened until they couldn’t take it anymore. I tried the same approach with the rest of my family and my closest friends. My brother Robert started following Christ, as did my sister Kim, but the others were more skeptical at first. A few of my friends prayed with me and accepted Jesus, but at the time, they weren’t willing to take further steps of faith. I came to realize that sometimes the people I most wanted to go with me on my spiritual journey were not willing to go.
I made the choice then to apply the words of an old song: “I have decided to follow Jesus. I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back. No turning back. Though none go with me, still I will follow.” That principal is as applicable in my life today as it was then.
It’s also true that not everyone whom I want to be my friend really wants me for a friend. Some of the most attractive potential friends already have their lives full. Either that, or they have made the decision that I’m not the kind of guy they want to be their friend. It hurts to realize I don’t always make the cut in the lives of people I admire. However, this has led me to an important discovery. It is a privilege to have people in my life who do want to be friends. It is also a privilege to have people who do want my counsel.
Friendship is a blessing we should never take for granted. People who seek our wisdom and counsel are also a special gift. Most of them probably have someone who would really like to speak wisdom and help into their lives, but their input is not welcome. We are possibly part of the answer to their prayers. We should never take that honor lightly. When we are welcomed as a friend or a counselor, we are given a place of honor by that person. God gives us the grace for special relationships, and we should honor God by loving His children well.
We make decisions every day that allow us to honor God. Some of the most important decisions we make have to do with how we use our time. Regular times of prayer and Bible study can help prepare us for the assignments the Lord has for us. Do we take time to seek God, or do we choose to sit and watch TV? Do we avoid pornographic input into our minds and hearts, or do we explore the polluting corruption of our culture? How we use our time and how we guard our hearts are important factors in our relationship with the Lord.
The Lord’s desire to reveal His love to the world is even greater than our desire to know Him and to be used by Him. Everything Christ did is an expression of God’s love and commitment to us. When we are convinced of God’s goodness and love for us, our hearts will declare with King David, “When you said, ‘Seek my face,’ my heart said to you, ‘Your face, O Lord, I will seek’.” (Psalm 27:8)